"According to author and inspirational speaker Iyanla Vanzant, being in the "meantime" means being in a state of limbo. "When you are not happy where you are and you are not quite sure if you want to leave or how to leave, you are in the meantime," she explains. Rather than wallow in confusion, Vanzant encourages you to use the meantime as an opportunity to prepare yourself for true love. The first order of business is to clean house, starting with the basement, the place in the psyche where you store your most destructive thoughts. Room by room, Vanzant takes you through a metaphorical cleaning of the soul. This way, when your meantime days are over and love finally comes knocking on the front door, you'll have a clean house to welcome love into"

 

I am reading this book now!  It is AWESOME!  I am in the meantime and have always been!  But I am really happy being in the meantime now!

 

I highly recommend this book!  

"Depressed people are great strugglers, but to struggle is to drown. Better to learn how to let the water hold you up." from the above book

 

What better way to describe not just depression, but a person's life with a CH. So many of us in this situation have dealt with depression, I thought this book would be very helpful to those of us stalled on the trip up The Hill.

 

"We depressives become shaped by our disease: the skills that we develop with depression in a vain effort to save ourselves pain-skills like emotional control, isolation, putting others first, being overresponsible-prevent our recovery. We have to give up the depressive habits that keep us down and make us vulnerable to relapse." from the above book

 

This book is like the bible for depression. It covers the hows and whys of the illness, but most importantly, it gives you very real and attainable skills to use in every aspect of your life. And believe it or not, they are written in a clear and uplifting manner. You can actually feel that they will make a difference. You want to do these things. To me, anyone who can get a depressed person motivated to change is a godsend!

 

Happy climbing!

 

sols

". Let's face it, the trip to The Hill leaves everyone, especially women, on the last threads of health and sanity. This book has so much info on restoring one's health and vitality I recommend it to everyone. It is the best explaination of how what we live through can change our wellness and how to learn to recognize the wounds of our souls in the illness and pain of our bodies. It is a manual for finding our own inner wisdom and living according to our truth"

 

Posted by tiredmom as copied from a quote from Sols

Thanks Sols!!

It's like $7.00 and so worth it.  The premise of the book is that people who grew up in an alcoholic home (whether the drinker was present or not) have shared experiences and develop a view of the world that is unique to this group.  My counselor recommended it.

An invaluable choice for co-dependents, and those suffering from depression or just general life confusion.  Glasser explains that everything that we do in life is a choice - every action that we take (or don't take) is something that we choose, and the emotions that follow are a result of that action, or lack thereof.  He lets you know that you can't change your emotions... only your actions & your thoughts.... but that eventually, by changing your actions & your thoughts, your emotions will eventually change too.  He is no-nonsense, but gentle at the same time.  I found myself nodding & agreeing out loud while I was reading his book, and it truly helped me start making more positive choices in my life for myself.

...How To Stop Controlling Others and Start Caring For Yourself...

I found this book to be very helpful in understanding why we have put up with our CH's and what they've done to us and our familys. It explains why we are "addicted" to our CH's and what we can do to "let go", let them take care of their own lives and help us start living ours.This is a great book and I highly recommend it as a step up that hill of sanity!

This book can be very helpful for finding one's own "spiritual wisdom and strength." The book was written with Cherokee pride and enfolds the seven sacred pathes. A great book that really helped me understand personal relationships, such as our planet(Earth), our family, friends, self healing (because of our past) and a much better outlook on our future. These are only a few of the items that this book of personal helping contains. The author is a bestseling Native American writer and artist of Cherokee, Seneca, and French descent.

Link to a great list of helpful books arranged by category

What an amazing little find this is.  Bizarre layout - lithographed comics go beside the chapters, which are laid out like little parables.  This is the "bible of self help" if you ask me... straight forward, no drama, great observations about life, personal drama, creating positive change.  "In your face" but very freeing at the same time.  I love his observations about "brown stamp collecting"  The idea that we are bent on collecting bad memories, and keeping them like a little collection... ultimately keeping us from being truly happy.... and how to release them.  It's astounding, how simply he lays out such incredible thoughts.  Very neat little book, and quite cheap at amazon.com

...Creating Your Life from the Inside Out....

Another really good book on helping yourself understand why we act the way we do. I found it similar to Codependent No More... except this book delves deeper into ourselves and show us we are not living our lives to it's full potential.This book can help you find the real you... the one under all that hurt and pain you have suffered.

After just reading the just first couple of chapters I am starting to feel really good about myself, and am enjoying the feeling!