What practices should be followed in the case of stillbirth, or a baby that dies shortly after birth?

Four papers have been validated by the Commitee on Jewish law and Standards on this issue. Conservative Judaism affirms that where Jewish law allows for more than one possible position, a congregation should follow the ruling of its rabbi, who as mara d'atra [halakhic authority] has the sole responsibility and authority in his/her community for making a p'sak [ruling/decision]. The four teshuvot are summarized below:

(I) Rabbi Isidoro Aizenberg, 1987. (a) When a full-grown, full-term baby dies within 30 days after birth, there is aniut, keriah, burial, shivah and shiloshim; no eulogy is delivered and the burial is peformed by the immediate family members. If the parents wish, they may recite the kaddish for 30 days. (b) If the baby was born prematurely, the above customs should be practiced only if it died more than 30 days after its birth. (c) If the baby was born prematurely and died before 30 days are over, the baby should be treated as a fetus. There is burial, but no other rituals are practiced. In all 3 cases, should parents ask the rabbi if they may recite the kaddish, their request should not be denied. This teshuva can obtained from the CJLS by one's local Conservative rabbi.

(II) Rabbi Debra Reed Blank - teshuva on miscarriage. She agrees with the first teshuva for the case of a full-term baby dying within 30 days after birth. For cases when the fetus was not born alive, full mourning rites are not called for or appropriate, for that would compromise the position of classical Judaism on the legitimacy of abortion in some circumstances. However, in event of a miscarriage the community should tend to both members of the couple under the rubric of bikur holim (visiting the sick), for they are suffering from the loss of the child that they were expecting to have. The couple may recite the kaddish if they choose. This teshuva can obtained from the CJLS by one's local Conservative rabbi.

(III/IV) Rabbi Stephanie Dickstein, 1999. In an extension and revision of her 1992 paper, she also agrees with the first teshuva for the case of a full-term baby dying within 30 days after birth. For cases when the fetus was not born alive, she holds that burial in a Jewish cemetery is required for stillbirths, and she recommends a funeral service. The stillborn may be named and circumcision can, but need not, be done. The grave should be marked later. After the first day, the parents may observe the practices associated with shiva b'tzniut (private observances which do not involve the community). This teshuva is online.

http://learn.jtsa.edu/topics/diduknow/responsa/hatesh_confront.shtml

More detailed responses to these situations can be found in Nina Beth Cardin's "Tears of Sorrow, Seeds of Hope: A Jewish Spiritual Companion for Infertility and Pregnancy Loss" (Woodstock, VT: Jewish Lights, 1999)